Apple Crisp is a fall classic.  In all of the baking I’ve done, I’ve never made a crisp, which happens to be one of Lloyd’s favorite desserts.  I know.  I’m a terrible girlfriend.  I never cook that poor kid anything.  He must be starving.

When I offered to make a dessert for the “Thanksgiving” dinner with my girlfriends last weekend, I decided to tackle an apple crisp for the first time.  Everyone told me it was “wicked easy” to make.  No pressure.  I researched some recipes, but clearly I settled on Ina’s Apple Crisp.  (I bet you didn’t see that one coming!)  Girlfriend’s never steered me wrong.

Making apple crisp sucks. 

Fail #1

Peeling and coring 20 small apples is not my idea of a good time.  I can’t tell you how many times I dropped the apples on the floor or in the trash (I was smart enough to put a clean bag in there before I started).  I managed to cut my fingers at least 3 times.  I got scared lazy and decided to half the recipe. 

Fail #2

All along I had intentions of doubling the topping.  I certainly don’t eat apple crisp for the apples!  However, I forgot that I had cut the amount of apples but still doubled the topping the original recipe called for.  You follow? 

I ended up with enough “crisp” to feed an army.

Preferably an army that digs oatmeal… and flour… and butter.  Lots of butter.

Fail #3

Then, I couldn’t figure out why my topping wasn’t becoming “crumbly” and sticking together.  The recipe calls for dicing the butter.  Dice I did.  But, I diced the butter into mini cubes.  I mean like, I cut the sticks into 8 tablespoons, and then quartered each tablespoon. 

I suggest not reading recipes so literally. 

I started to panic.  Only me!  Only I could manage to ruin a “wicked easy” classic.  I covered my apples with my “crisp” and it looked like it was going to taste strictly of flour.  I got nervous when it wouldn’t brown.

The only solution was to go all Paula Dean on its ass, ya’ll.

I cut up roughly TWO MORE STICKS of butter and put it under the broiler.

Problem solved!

Old-Fashioned-Apple Crisp 

Ingredients

• 5 pounds McIntosh or Macoun apples
• Grated zest of 1 orange
• Grated zest of 1 lemon
• 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed orange juice
• 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
• 1/2 cup granulated sugar
• 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon ground nutmeg

Topping Ingredients

• 1 1/2 cups flour
• 3/4 cup granulated sugar
• 3/4 cup light brown sugar, packed
• 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
• 1 cup oatmeal
• 1/2 pound cold unsalted butter, diced

Directions

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Butter a 9 by 14 by 2-inch oval baking dish.
2. Peel, core, and cut the apples into large wedges. Combine the apples with the zests, juices, sugar, and spices. Pour into the dish.
3. To make the topping, combine the flour, sugars, salt, oatmeal, and cold butter in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. Mix on low speed until the mixture is crumbly and the butter is the size of peas. Scatter evenly over the apples.
4. Place the crisp on a sheet pan and bake for 1 hour until the top is brown and the apples are bubbly. Serve warm. 

Just add butter, ya’ll!

I was so relieved that I was able to salvage my dessert!

The addition of citrus was bangin’.

Dig right in.

Apple-y, crisp-y, butter-y. 

I’m thinking a hearty scoop of vanilla bean ice cream would have been the perfect accoutrement. 

Although, I can’t think of anything that ice cream wouldn’t complement…

Truthfully, I would pick something chocolaty over a “fruit” dessert any day that ends in “y”…

but this may have changed my mind? 

Blogging has definitely made me step outside my comfort zone in the kitchen, which is always a good thing. 

Until you go to put on your jeans. 

Lloyd was so thrilled with this dessert, that he requested I make it more often.

Sure thing.  As soon as you finish peeling those apples.